Outdoors 

Hey Readers,  
my word of the week is:

because for most of the time this week the weather has been lovely so it has given us opportunity to visit places outside, which is fantastic for me as it’s much cheaper to go visit the park. Not to mention the fact that visiting the park is it’s free being and it is pleasant being in the open air. 

The boys have a lot of energy in the summer holiday so it’s been great to be outside to burn off for the energy playing outside. I also get some quiet time to read my book which isn’t often at the moment.

Also went to a field to check out to see if our  tents are still usable, ehich we haven’t used for 7 years to see if it’s still usable. Good news is that the tent is still usable and can fit us all. Therefore meaning we can go on holiday soon and use the tent. The boys are super excited as it is the first first time for my boys  camping so that should be a fun experience.

Cheers for reading X 

The Reading Residence

Scooter

Hey readers,

My word of the week:

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This is becuase about a month ago my son broke his three-wheel scooter and we have been promising to get him a two wheel scooter, because he’s a big boy now. I was having a gander on Facebook the other night and I came across 2 two- wheeled scooters for a small price so I got them on a spur of the moment type thing. 

So,  this week the boys have been enjoying going outside on their scooters.They adjusted really well with their new scooters  with the whole balancing thing. 
I am impressed with how well my 3 year old is doing. We thought he would really struggle but he’s managed it and absolutely loves it. 

Therefore, I have been mainly watching them scooter about around the block and playing chase with one another, simple pleasures.  
Cheers for reading X

The Reading Residence

Blog Therapy 

Hey readers,

Some days are really crap, you wonder how you are going to get through them especially when it is only 9:30 on the morning.

I am so tearful because I have reduced one set of medication. I know it is only a side effect and will be worth the pain in the long run. But right now it is a struggle especially when I am so needed during the summer holiday.

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I am not very good when people demand me for long periods of time.  For me being autistic it is mentally draining and a real battle. I need to switch off and sometimes I just need escape to my bedroom for some peace for five.

I feel a bit suffocated as well being in a flat and the weather being rubbish. I just haven’t got the motivation to anything when I am so tired.

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I feel so guilty for feeling tired when I should be on the ball but sometimes I question My ability to parent such as today. I know this is just short lived and because I am frustrated, that being said I have to battle with this thoughts.

I feel pulled into two ways to right my personal feelings as one side of me thinks I am being silly. The other side feels it is cathartic and may help someone.

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It is amazing how powerful words on and just writing down your thoughts can really help even if there is no solution. It is a bit like therapy and that is one of the reasons why I love to blog. As in real life I am rubbish at expressing myself to others. Words seem to get mangled up and I stutter and shut down. Again this is influenced by my autism.

So, that is why I turn to my blog as a place of comfort and release of emotions. I don’t feel judged and it is a place where I can freely right without having to worry about all the other social aspects involved when speaking verbally.

Cheers for reading X

Bringing up Georgia
Real Mum Reviews

On the side line 

Hey readers,

When I was a child I did this thing called masking, aka faking it and what this means is that I learnt the behaviour of others. The problem being is that if something changes that I can mess up badly because I can’t be flexible with my thinking. That is the one of the characteristics of autism is we manage change and see things  black or white especially when it comes to learn.

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I think it’s really hard being an autistic girl growing up because there is so much more pressure to be sociable then a boy. That all the boys got away with not getting noticed there for less social pressure. I used to absolutely hate being a girl because of this reason and I thought boys had it a lot easier or more relaxed attitude with regards to social and communication which suited me perfectly.

Now that I’m an adult I find it a bit more easier because I have more experience and knowledge but I still frequently mess up. If I am feeling anxious or if there is too much going on in my head can’t seem to focus on the rules. There are times when stressful factors cause me more brain power than normal and it is like I regress in my behaviour. That is why it’s so hard to measure autism, as it is not something that you can say x y and z it’s constantly shifting depending on the environment and mindset of that individual.

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Since being a parent I have learnt that there are so many other social rules involved when bringing up a child.

I first it’s lovely when my children where new born as there is less pressure on me to be sociable but since my child has started school last year I noticed that there’s a hell of a lot more interaction going on.

Me being an autistic parent does affects my self esteem. A lot of the time I feel inadequate,  especially as my husband is very good at communicating and engaging with others. It leaves me feeling really angry and frustrated. I know comparing is the worst thing to do but it coincides with me learning of other people.

I think  one of the hardest and upsetting things is when  people don’t see you as an individual but some sort of invalid because you’re autistic. They don’t look past the label or they do but then they just talk down to you in a condescending way. The thing is I am aware exactly what is happening, I just I don’t have the skills to communicate and express myself as clearly as other people do.

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It has really made me feel quite low at times because I feel like I can’t give my child everything that a typical parent has to offer. I suppose that is why I enjoy the school holidays more because I don’t have to worry about the social things. The only downside is that when I return I have to deal with the social side of education and what not.I feel rubbish and I have felt very very low causing me to struggle to get up in the mornings. I have also learnt to avoid situations and tend to get my husband to do them tasks because it’s too upsetting at times to have to face the discrimination against me. I think that’s one of the saddest things about being an autistic parent is the fact that you deal with a lot of rejection or misunderstanding. I like my voice isn’t heard and again that familiar Outcast feeling appears.

Cheers for reading X

Twin Mummy and Daddy
Sticky Mud and Belly Laughs

Homely

Hey readers,

My word of the week is:

Homely.png

I always have this problem with feeling guilty attached to staying at home with my boys. There is so much pressure to do something and be on the go that we can almost forget to take things slowly.

It is hard when you really struggle but taking it the slow lane has really helped me to enjoy my time with the boys. Don’t get me wrong there are moments when I want tear my hair out with all the bickering over such insignificant things.

I have enjoyed the most cuddles and just chatting whilst playing hairdressers. The boys have been more relaxed and I think we all have appreciated it.

Of course we didn’t stop everything we fitting in trying out our new dinosaur tray and making some yummy, scrummy getting in my tummy chocolate cake. It was divine.

Cheers for reading X

The Reading Residence

Cool for cats

Hey readers,

You can learn a lot about cats about how to live a more relaxed life. I hate being human sometimes, I just doubt everything in my tiny little mind. I dread Friday is the worst, it is like I have had a whole week to beat myself up on not being good enough.

CAT 3

Why do ‘some’ of us torture ourselves, we think we are weak when really we must be strong to get through this personal torment. There are days when all I would love to do is sit back in my hammock and just forget everything.  I know, I know I think too much, that is always been my downfall. I am just so glad for summer holidays, I am exhausted from worrying about not being good enough parent.

CAT 1

I hate failure, we all fear it but if asked what is success, I wouldn’t be able to tell you so how can I fail if I don’t know what the alternative is?!

Life is much simpler being a cat, all you need to worry about is the small stuff like finding a place that is warm and sunshine touching your fur. How amazing would that be to have to care in the world. Maybe I should ask my husband because he is an expert in it.

Being a cat has so many benefits such as, getting rent free, being able to sleep as much as you want and have the freedom to roam about and piss on your territory . I would definitely be up for that, haha. Even if people annoy you, you cats can walk away and not give a damn, that must be so liberating not caring what other people think. There is no drama about being fat and what worrying about how people view you, you just prance about in your fur all day, look great with no effort whatsoever.

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Told you cats have it great, we can learn a thing or too.

I now leave you on a final quote:

Cats are connoisseurs of comfort.  

James Herriot.

Cheers for reading X

Best of Worst

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