Observations of what happens in a heatwave 

Hey readers,

 Have you noticed that it is a tat on the hot side, yep, me too and I am terribly British in which I love a good moan about the weather. So let’s look at my accurate portray of what it is like to experience going through a heatwave.

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You know you are going through a heatwave when every sentence, every hour of the day is announcing to anyone who is listening, ‘It’s hot’.  Because no one obviously has noticed that big  yellow ball in the sky.

You go bat shit crazy in the supermarket for multi packs of ice lollies like your life depends on it.

You love your fan like a family member.

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Never has a cold shower felt so good until your child decides to walk in on you and declare you have a hole.

You get beyond frustrated at stupid questions asked by children about who is the smelliest when really all that matters right now is trying to concentrate on cramming as may ice cubes as possible into your cup.

You worry your bladder may explode because you have drank your weight in cold drinks in just one day.

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Your pillow has never felt so pumped then during this heatwave with constantly turning over the pillow at night.

You suddenly become a raging manic woman over the tiniest of things  because you fuse has finally blown and throwing wet pants on mummy’s head tips her right over that edge.

The dreaded bedtime you have to do. The ultimate question, should or should you not open the windows? Where the bedroom is like a fucking sauna and outside is just noise from people constantly revving and horn beeping timed just around the bed time hour. Don’t they know these people outside having fun at bedtime hour makes this mama very, very angry.

You pine for autumn so hard, please bring it back, because I don’t know if I can cope with any more under boob sweat.

Cheers for reading X

diaryofanimperfectmum
Mummuddlingthrough

Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com

Why I am pro-child telly!

Hey readers,

For the past five years of being a mother my main obsession has been Television / entertainment. I have been rattled with guilt, paranoia to near destruction of what other people think, mainly because of the pressure of social media but also because I feel my autism is a downfall. Therefore, I need to score points of being ‘ better’ because of my inabilities in other areas.

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I would obsess so much that i could not think of anything else, I would not enjoy my time with my child and felt always on edge.

I felt that my child if they watched TV every single condition associated with allowing your child to watch TV they would get.

I would get annoyed at hubby being so relaxed with just turning the telly on and I am always on edge. My whole body aches from anxiety. I worry that I am a failure because I allow my child to watch TV.

But recently I have learnt to accept that you know what TV isn’t that bad. It can be enjoyable, I love good old Mr Bean.

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TV can have a positive effect it can help with my son’s speech delay, it can educate them or it can simply help my eldest wind down from when he gets in from school.

I have noticed that if I live the TV all day long thew kids get bored, they wonder off. They look for something to do and they happy play together or entertain themselves.

When I dropped the guilt and thought fuck it, as long as they are happy, fed and alive that is all that matters.

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It is not the end of the world, it is so hard for any more especially first time round to know what to do and how to deal with giving the right amount of input.

But hand on my heart I have found the more relaxed I am, the more relaxed everyone else is around me.

Sometimes, you have to accept what the situation is and yes sometimes the 43 inch  babysitter helps because I am struggling or just need a break.

We are all more happy when I adopt this attitude. Plus, my eldest watched very little TV and very likely autistic. my youngest watches a TV, more clear in speech and socialable and not likely autistic. What does that say?!

So, if your reading this, give yourself a break, you are properly doing fine and the more research shows us that more then ever are parents more engaged.

Cheers for reading X

 

3 Little Buttons
JakiJellz
Best of Worst

What is Home?

Hey readers,

The people of Wayfair went on the hunt to find out what home is for people. This is what Wayfair did:

We hit the streets of London over the Easter weekend equipped with an armchair and a microphone to find out what home really means to us! The findings were both insightful and heartwarming, exposing that our homes are much more than just buildings or places, they are family, comfort, inspiration, happiness and much more. Not only that, but we spoke to a further 400 recipients across the UK & found that over 71% of people coined the sofa as the most important item of furniture in their home, placing the importance on socializing and making use of communal spaces (or being couch potatoes if you look at it another way!)  

Wayfair are doing a campaign on ‘What is Home?’ and for me personally home is not necessarily the physical things but the meaning associated with home. It is safety where when I close the front door I can come into my home and feel less judged.

You see I am autistic and I struggle going out in the outside world, so knowing I have a place where I can relax and not have to put on a mask is comforting. It makes me feel less anxious especially after a hard day, I can come home to my family and just be me without the fear of being judged.

Home is a place where I don’t have to be agitated or on guard, I can kick back on the sofa and just be. Enjoying the calm moments of reading a book with a blanket whilst my two boys are playing next door together with their Lego.

It feels like home because I am a mum and I provide all the needs for my children where they can fun but also develop as children. Where they will hold the memories for years of all the happy times of their childhood.

It is times when we lounge on a Sunday as a family scrawled out whilst watching Big Heads and rooting for King Henry VIII over Donald Trump.

Home is where we get excited about the small things we can do together as a family like watching a sunset or have Sunday dinner and discussing why mummy is called poopoo, while the boys are in hysterics over the hilariousness of it all.

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What does home mean to you? What ideas stir up when you think of home?

Cheers for reading X

Cuddle Fairy
Bringing up Georgia
Pink Pear Bear

Contentment 

Sometimes I am knackered,

But then I look at you

Drifting off to sleep,

Knowing you are happy

And content.

The doubts of motherhood

Erode away,

Knowing that I might be

Doing this crucial job

OK and then for moment

I applaude my role

And that deep down

I’m doing OK.

Grumpy

Hey readers,

My word of the word of the week is:

Grumpy

because sometimes life sucks, especially during the week before your period, which affects me emotionally the worst. Seriously, the smallest things are triggers and I get SO irritated, breathe and I may snap, lol!

It doesn’t help that I have a stinking cold courtesy of my boys, cheers lads I love you too 😉 So I have been accumulating piles of snot rags with this constant stream of snot, when will it end, boohoo! It sucks too because as a mum you are expected to just get on with it regardless if you feel like hell. I mean my arm could be dangling of and I would still have to get up and wipe my son’s arse! Parenting sometimes lovely other times well quite frankly it is pants!

I be honest I spend most of my time mopping at home, in the most comfortest clothes as I am so bloated. But I am entitled to that because I am a women and that my friends is a fact!

Hope you have had a lovely week readers,

Cheers for reading X

 

The Reading Residence

Depression and parenting

 

Hey readers,

Sometimes I feel that on my blog I should not discuss depression as I am so ashamed, because that is what society makes me feel like at times. I have always been embarrassed to say that I take anti-depressants and that in-turn makes me feel weak. But deep down I know that my depression is genetic and chemical reaction, it doesn’t make me a bad person because of it.

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Truth be told as a parent with depression there days when I hardly do anything, the only thing I attempt is to the the bear minimum for my children. Once the children have gone to bed it allows me time to cry from all the build up sadness and  frustration from the day.

Some days are better then others, but now again I get dips and need that extra hand from my husband. For instance, I struggle to deal with the social side of taking my children to nursery or school. It is not always just the socialising but the physical environment is so hard for me to manage. I literally feel so suffocated  and overwhelmed by the sensory stimulation that is happening in the room. I am autistic on top of all this and usually I can find that it interacts with the depression.

Therefore heightened social situations can make me feel rubbish and can contribute towards me beating myself up for not being a good enough at being a parent because I am not like all the parents. It tends to result in me coming home and breaking down. I feel rubbish and tend to just want to sleep in order to escape the reminder of my shortfalls as a parent and person.

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Other times, I struggle with dealing with the temperament of my children or talking about topics such as death, as this can trigger my OCD. No one teaches you how to communicate to your child and some days I just have to admit to defeat as it is too tough for me to deal with and hubby would have to take over.

When I am going through a dip in my mood I can spend the whole day dragging myself down, I physically feel on edge and know that after all this there is going to be a massive panic attack. I hide away from my husband, as I am not good at communicating in that moment, I don’t instantly have the words to say. I feel therefore this risks the changes of irritability between me and my husband. I don’t like being touched for a cuddle, I just need the time for me to mope and allow the emotions to pass. I don’t want solutions, I try lots of things but in that moment I just need to be. I don’t run form it anymore, at the end of it I kind of feel better getting it out of my system. It helps me feel calmer and my body feels like it is being heard.

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Sometimes, the best thing is to accept it at that moment, don’t find solutions because at the end of the day it is something that you can deal with at a later date when your mind is in a clearer state. I have learnt when you are that emotional, nothing makes sense and I tend to make the wrong decisions so it is better for me to not make any decisions at all during my ‘meltdowns’. I feel now that I have learnt how I react and what is best for me is less painful and it allows me to feel more in control ironically.

Cheers for reading X

3 Little Buttons

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