What I like about Christmas

Hey readers,

Can you actually believe that we are in DECEMBER, its true! Let’s get in the festive spirit and things Christmas related.

On the big day you can eat your body weight in calories and drink the booze until your sozzled on the sofa.

Kids are not allowed to stay they are bored. because how can they be bored with that amount of new s**t!

 Normally tat is frowned upon, but the brighter and more daring the decoration the better Christmas vibe it brings!

Xmas, Christmas, New Year, Holiday

Finally something half decent is on TV and I am not even talking about Netflix, I am just talking about the ‘normal’ channels.

All the stand up DVD’S come out!

There is nothing more beautiful than having candles on and watching the twinkly lights in the evening.

Now I have children I have an excuse to read the Beano and feel the love once more.

Background, Christmas

Roast potatoes lavished with goose fat, why?… ermmm because it is christmas and I can do what I like and no one will bat an eyelid!

Christmas toilet roll, can you get anymore festive.

I find it really therapeutic wrapping presents, especially when I have the radio on in the background and a good old alcoholic drink in my hand, really helps me get in the mood for Christmas.

Having family of my own to share it with, at one point in my life I had no one. So, I feel truly blessed to be able people that I can call my own and celebrate with.

Using Father Christmas as a threat to keep your little ones in order I am going miss when it is over.

Santa, Polar Bear, Christmas, Snow

Seeing the magic in your kids eyes and that lovely innocent excitement on Christmas Eve.

Having snuggles with the boys on the sofa Christmas eve and watching Channel four special film they do every year (seems to be a tradition in our household).

Cheers for reading X

 

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Tough

Hey readers,

This week my word is:

TOUGH

for many reasons but for starters lets indulge in a bit of self pity. It was that time of the month where my hormones were going absolutely mental and quite frankly I got a bit bat shit crazy. If I am not laughing maniacally then I am crying in the pillow or biting my husbands head off. I literally need a week alone away from any humans, the hell of being a woman!

I went to my husband’s uncle funeral and pleasantly surprised at how well my eldest coped. He really struggles with social situations and new environments. Luckily we only had to deal with a couple of meltdowns, which for him is really good.

My boys were happy as we got to explore a new playground, however, the youngest decided to jump from a high up climbing frame, even though we said no he still did it. The noise before the landing was epic mind, he is fine though and fingers crossed it might of taught him not to be blinking super man (well at least for a little while anyways, lol).

Cheers for reading X

 

Waiting 

The waiting is the hardest,

Not knowing,

No answers,

Just holding on. 

I have no control,

I am left stranded,

My future is in there hands. 

Who am I? 

Who am I?

I don’t know who I am anymore,

I have lost sight,

Of the person who I once was.

Rough patch

Some days are tough, struggling with anxiety seems a constant battle. The intrusive thoughts are so exhausting for hours they constantly battering my eyes with there nonsense. But in that moment it feels real and the thoughts of escaping are wanted.

I want the noise to stop so I can think more rationally.

I am going through a period of chronic anxiety triggered by my medication being reduced. I just got to keep going, riding the storm when it feels like I am drowning.

I’ve been here before many a time and I know I can get through it. It is just sticking with it through the highs and the lows. Which I know the sound of highs is a bit odd idea but actually having highs is also part of crippling anxiety. I can be laughing so intensely like a manic and the next petrified. It is exhausting but writing it down helps clear my head from all the murky mess that revolves around all day long.