School 

Hey readers,
My word of the week is:

SCHOOL

because it’s a return of school for my oldest and he is now in year 1. He has been finding going back to school really hard these past couple of days. This is because of the change in the teaching as it is more  focused on learning over play.

 He is not very good with change and he needs things explaining to him. So, as you can imagine he’s not very happy. He has been complaining that he hate school, thinks it’s stupid and wishes he was back in reception again.

I just hope that with time that he can ease back into it and establish a routine.  I think this will help him feel more happier about gong to school.

Today my youngest has returned to nursery for one last year and then he will start school in September.

He on the other hand is super excited to be returning. I am looking forward to getting a better routine and quiet time. It has been lovely having them but it’s nice to have a break from it all.
Cheers for reading X

The Reading Residence

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Spring I blooming love you

Hey readers,

Today (20/03/2017) marks the first day of Spring Equinox so here is a list of things I love about Spring.

spring

This is the time when flowers start to bloom and blossom can be found everywhere.

Sadly, the blossom is short lived but is beautiful seeing blossom like confetti blowing in the air.

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What is lovely about spring is more colour dotted about and sense of lightness that it brings through flowers, pastel colours in fashion to lighter meals that we eat.

More lighter evenings gives a sense of calm and wanting to stay out later. If the weather is good it is pleasurable to eat Al fresco.

picnic

With spring brings a mix bag of weather but a lot of the time we are blessed with warmer. Therefore, meaning higher chances of being outside, making it a lot more easier to look after children compared to being stuck indoors.

Something magical to do during the spring time is go to the woods and see the area covered in bluebells, so picturesque.

Spring marks the start of new life and it is lovely to see the new baby animals slowly emerging in the wildlife. You don’t have to go far to find baby animals, I have find the coots already making nests locally to me.

As wildlife slowly migrates back in England you get more of an opportunity to hear the birds calling and singing that takes place during the mating season.

baby gueese

One of the best things with the warmer weather is not having to wear heavy clothes making it more comfortable  not to be so covered up. Plus, as the warmer weather occurs during spring we can finally get to wear sandles. I just love the sensation of fresh air brushing against my toes.

Cheers for reading X

Why I quit the linky

Hey readers,

A couple of weeks ago I decided to be brave and stop using blog linkies or order to promote my blog. There are several reasons why I chose to took this action but hand on heart it was the  right decision for me at this time.

Firstly, the main reason I quit linkies was because I was bored with all the work and not really getting much out of it. It just felt like another chore that I needed to do in order to be some sort of success, when really it is not the be all and end all of the blogging world.

OK, linkies are a brilliant way to find out about similar bloggers who are like minded to you. It is a great way to learn and develop on skills, especially when you first start out in the blogshere. Some people still use them year in year out and others decide to not use them.  shock horror is that they have survived and are still successful without the additional help from linkies.

The downfall of linkies is that you have to wrack your brains for comments especially when you wouldn’t normally be motivated to visit that post. Sadly, due to the rules of the linky you are expected to visit and it is a bit of a drag. I just get the feeling of being superficial and vice versa when other bloggers come to my post because of the linky rules and not necessarily enjoying the content.

I be honest I was a bit scared when leaving linkies cause let’s face it linkies have a purpose and one of the main ones is that it brings page views. From not using linkies for a week now I strangely started with a decrease in views but then increased. At least now I know that the people who do visit my blog come of their own free will and not down to stupid rules from a linky.

There is a problem that if you find a particularly linky useful that they are only available at a set period so you have to be around that time to link up.

That being said linkies in the begin gave me more confidence but the downside was the commitment that took. I found that I spend more time dealing with the practical side of a linky then actually blogging itself which again is hard work and sometimes I don’t want  to commit to that.

Now that I don’t join in with linkies can actually comment on actual blogs I like. It gives me more motivation to comment on other blogs that I enjoy rather then under obligation to do so on a blog link up.

Another issue I have found with taking part in blog linkies is that sometimes you worry about content being suitable. whereas, if you just post straight up on your blog you don’t have to worry about offending other bloggers as people have the choice to read my blog or not.

So, yes that is my case for me quitting linkies. I refound my fondness for blogging and enjoy more now I am less responsible for keeping on track of the linky admin side. Though, I am grateful for finding linkies in the begging of my blog journey as they found my feet in the ever so complex world of blogging.

Cheers for reading X

 

This time of year

Hey readers,

This time of year when it is the build up to Christmas I struggle with. The whole time feels intensified and crazy that it gets to me and though it does not affect me straight away, I can guarantee without a shadow of a dealt I will have a meltdown during the festive period.

I have autism and for me one of my struggles is socialising and sadly it appears a social rule is to meet all the people you know in a short period to spend some quality time with.

My problem is I can do social but really have difficulties with long periods with people, not getting a break and dealing with people who I may only see once or twice of year. I need my time on my own to calm down.

It can be hard because other people might not understand my disability and may interpretate my behaviour as being cold and not welcoming.  They don’t understand I need time to myself and breaks because it is so mentally challenging trying to mask and put on this friendly person when really at times I just want to tell everyone to fuck off with the rubbish. All these random social rules with all the niceties, when most of the time people don’t really bother. But because it is Christmas it is about family and we have to adapt these weird rules during Christmas. There so much social  pressure and I struggle to mask my trueness for long periods of time.

I have to hold my tongue  and monitor the things I say, because I am an adult and not many people expect autistic adults, especially female to behaviour childlike. God forbid you’re an autistic woman with children, I should know better and it is outrageous to even think about behaving oddly. They presume if we behave childish then we definitely made the wrong decision to have children and probably wondering why aren’t social knocking on the door.

Why do I do this, get involved in this social situations? Well to be perfectly honest wit you I am so desperate to fit in that I put the pressure on myself and other times I am wanting to keep my hubby sweet.

But after all the hype, all the energy into communicating, new environments, new dynamics and the pretense that I have to deal with I am left feeling exhausted. My bones will ache for days after, I will cry a shed load and my mind will basically collapse as it has used all my stored up resources to mimic neurotically people.

So yeah I am miserable cow, but do I have the right to be? who’s needs get priority, how much can I be accepted before being called childish.

Then after all the palava I am left feeling deflated and depressed. Wondering what the point is and why autism is such a bitch. It causes a rift between me and  my hubby. Ok he knows some bits about autism but he also has his own agenda and it is not always easy for him to see my point without probably thinking I am being selfish or there is so much for him to deal with that he needs a break.

Cheers for reading.

Spectrum Sunday

Routine

Hey Readers,

My word of the week is:

Image result for routine

This is because my son on Monday started full days at nursery. I have learnt to adapt this week to the changes of times when collecting and dropping off my boy. As I also have to get the other child in my life goes to nursery.

As my son eats a main meal at school I have also had to change the meal times which is a bit frustrating wen you have to adapt. Especially when going out shopping then trying to rush a about in the kitchen like a crazy woman.

In other news my youngest this week he seems to be having the most awful tantrums that can last for like 10-15 mins. It is unusual as he normally doesn’t last three minutes usually. Oh boy do they hurt your ears as they are frequent causing me to be so tired having to deal with the drama. When we picked up my eldest he decided to have a fit because I would not get him an ice-cream from the shop. So all the way back from the school to home he whaled and screeched. I hope this is short period and hope it is linked just from tiredness at the return of going to nursery.

Hope you enjoyed your week.

Cheers for reading X

The Reading Residence

Peeved off 

Hey readers,
Do you ever get days that piss you off. Seriously today is one of them. Whatever I look at makes me miffed. I think it because I an due on and I am slowly transforming into psycho bitch,I kid you not! That is what hubby calls me when the painters and decorators come and visit. So here is my list of things that have really irritated the hell out of me today. Be warned I have fire coming out of my mouth.

1) Left over balloons that pop randomly that make you jump out of your skin and really hurt my ears.

2) NT’s not understanding how change and swapping plans makes me a nervous wreck. One minute I have a plan and then you go along and wreck that by changing it to something completely different. I struggle with flexible thinking but you just say I am treating you bad and it doesn’t matter if I have Asperger as it is all bullshit and I am just being childish. Yep misunderstood or what and let’s face it autism can be displayed in childlike behaviour that is just the nature of the beast!

3) Having long periods of time spend with a person that you are warn out.I love the people put focusing on the social interaction is so hard not to mention the tedious social chit chat. It is also really challenging for me to have to think on my feet and try to comment on the moment. Sometimes my mind just goes blank not because I am bored but it is a real struggle to deal with what is happening and trying to work it all out. It sucks all my energy and sooner or later I will snap as I don’t have any respite till late and if I dare try to go for a break I am viewed as being anti-social and being a misery guts for isolating myself from the situation.

4) Your tone of voice is hurting my ears. To me you hate me and I just want to vanish and hide away. You think I am being mellow dramatic but something deep inside me wants to scream or breakdown in tears.

5) Having to adapt and deal with others gaining control is hard for me as I like control. Having control is comforting and soothing for me . I like to know what is happening and knowing the answers to be then taken off me I feel lost and anxious. It can trigger meltdowns or me wanting to self harm as I hate the situation where I have no control and meant to just go along with it. I can’t participate a little bit as I struggle with the the greyness. I am an all or nothing type of person as I can’t manage the balance where to do what if I am sharing a role. At least with having all the control I can take action and get involved. Alternatively, I can chill out to a certain extend when loss the power giving it to someone else to have that responsibility. But then I ultimately don’t know what the hell is happening causing me to get anxious. I can’t win because I am rubbish at balancing and getting the formation right. So I go back to me being yet another failure in my eyes.

Cheers for reading X

Sons, Sand & Sauvignon
Pink Pear Bear
My Petit Canard
Sticky Mud and Belly Laughs

Beach

Hey readers,

Hope your getting through the second week of half term without pulling all your hair out 😂
My word of the week is:

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OK it doesn’t sum up all my week but it was the highlight of my week. Me and the hubby decided to take the boys to the beach for a day out. We don’t really have the funds for a holiday so it was nice to do something different within our means. Which my son ironically kept asking to go to the sea and eat chips.  So that is what we did on Tuesday and I’m so glad we did.  It is amazing just a change of scenery can do for you. Nothing beats breathing in the seaside fumes. Plus I was starting to get a bit groundhog day. I just needed a break from normality.
Anyhow another event this week was taking the boy and I on a ‘date’. I don’t often get 1-2-1 time with my eldest. It was great fun going on the train,getting a shake going in a Top Gear stimulator ride which made my son laugh from start to finish. To make the day complete I got the luxury of muching around Paperchase which is one of my favourite shops. The Boy got a to meet a minion which made his day. He is Minion obsessed and is always mimicking them all day long.
So yeah, this week has been good.
Cheers for reading X

The Reading Residence