In the evening light

Hey readers,

I am sat here all alone with no noise bar me typing away on the laptop. I like this time as it is my time, quite with no need to think or understand silly little rules.

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 It is time to wind down and relax before I panic again how am I going to get through the next day.

One thing for sure is that I have made it through the day and nothing particular bad has happened.

Both my boys are happy snoring their little heads off without any worry so I take that as a good day.

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My body feels relaxed as I am watching the sunset and the colour of the sky brightens my eyes.I feel safe without any threat, which I am forever grateful.

There have been times when I have been really scared with the unknown, decisions that were out of control. Lies and deceit form people who were meant to be honest.

But all that does not matter now as we have moved on, like the earth continuing to spin on regardless of what life throws at us.

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I suppose my favourite thing about the evening is getting the opportunity to slip into bed where it is warm and safe. Knowing that I may not have everything but what I do have is love from my husband and children. You can get so bogged down and confused with all the messages everywhere that you can forget what is in front of you. I am no means perfect for starters

 I am autistic but am grateful right now and feel blessed for what I do have. I have been know to moan and even cry myself to sleep with feelings of self dealt, confusion and hurt with life.

 Some days I feel absolutely terrified to get up in the morning, I put so much thought into the detail that you forget the basics of putting one foot in front of the next.

 Today is a different story, I take how feel and own it. I am learning more about myself through motherhood and just plodding alone like the rest of us.
Cheers for reading X

JakiJellz
3 Little Buttons
My Random Musings

How to be content

Hey readers,

In this day and age it is hard not to compare yourself.  I for one am guilty of this, it is so easy to assume that one has it all whilst you feel like you are floating above water.

We can forget that what you see with your eyes on the surface may not be the actually truth. How can possible know everything about someone when we only see a glimpse.

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That is why it is important to look for content within and not on unrealistic ideas that assume make other happy.

Sometimes you can fall under the trap of negativity, where all you see is the bad stuff. That is why it is important to take stock of what is good in life. No one has it all but I am a true believer in that there is one good thing in life even if it is small.

Today I felt sad as if my life is going anyway. I could continue down the negative spiral but won’t get me anywhere, it will just make me feel ten times worse.

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The things I have succeeded in is getting up and making sure my children are well and happy. I have read a book and even writing this post is productive.

I think it is important to accept the things you do have and not dwell. Being content with yourself so a hard thing to achieve when there are so many messages everywhere telling us to be like this or that. You feel like you are questioning everything.

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I think the main that I have learnt in my adult life is meaning and the value you put on something. I think that is the powerful thing. If you let go of connecting to something you would be amazed at how little impact it has on you.

I think the thing that is key in being content is questioning everything and working out what it means to you. Deep down is it really important to you?

Cheers for reading X

Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com

Mummuddlingthrough

Cuddle Fairy

Autistic Feet

Hey readers,

My feet hurt today as a result of over using them yesterday. I know so what?! Here is the think why I am talking about my feet is the fact I am autistic you see and my feet posture is not very good. I have always had problems with standing and the way I coordinate my feet.

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I am so clumsy as well when I walk, I am guaranteed to trip up even if there is nothing there. The amount of bashing my toes into stuff and cursing under my breathe is unreal. My husband affectionately finds it funny.

I also shuffle my feet, especially when I am stressed. I am constantly getting told stop shuffling your feet like I am some kind of child.

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You don’t realise how hard it is to put one foot in front of the other. It can be really challenging. I never really thought about my physical problems when I was younger and now as an autistic adult I am still learning.

It is my arms I struggle with – not really knowing what to do with them when I walk, I find them painful and just frustrating. It is like I have to train my mind to swing my arms when I walk. It is so difficult as I am rubbish at doing two tasks at the same time.

One of the major problems that I struggle with as an autistic person is using my spacial awareness skills and navigating around objects and people. I am not good at forward planning especially in a busy place where I am over stimulated with the sensory information. Sometimes, I get so overwhelmed that I need to sit down and take a moment to take a break because of how mentally exhausting it is.

If I don’t think about my walking and focus on it, I really struggle with bumping into things or trip up.

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We as a human are meant to learn this skill at an early age and it to be developed. Therefore not having to think about it as it is a long term in implicit memory. It is wired in the brain so you don’t have to think about it, it is second nature.  Being an autistic person we miss out on this opportunity and I do wonder before language evolved how many humans died due to lack of ‘natural’ skills due to having a different way of thinking.

So, therefore if you do wonder why do us autistic people get SO tired this is a little insight, because we have to constantly work our asses of and remembering all these ‘natural’ rules that people take for granted.

Cheers for reading X

Best of Worst
Cuddle Fairy
Bringing up Georgia

Dealing with chub rub

Hey readers,

Today is 30 degrees outside which means hot and sweaty weather, perfect for us fat people (like myself) or thought it is not just an overweight persons problem but anyone really who has thighs that touch.  What better thing to weather is a skirt or a dress  to help keep you cool, One problem with this idea and it is the awful CHUB RUB. 

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If you have never heard of the term chub rub it is basically where your thighs sweat so much and rub together causing friction which results in painful red area and could potentially lead to painful blister. Something that you want to experience especially when also dealing with the heat.

So, how do you deal with chub rub you are asking?well, for a short term relief you could use talc powder/deodorant or similar to help, the only downfall is that it is short lived and sweating loads can cause it not to be effective.

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Of course there is the trusted cycling shorts to but barrier between your thighs. Fantastic and I can declare it works. Downside is that it is an extra layer of clothing, meaning more sweat. Which if you ok with it  then go ahead. For me I hate sweat and what to feel as comfortable as possible.

Next is this product called Lanacane anti-chaffing gel which works wonders and lasts a long time. I keep it in my bag in case I need to add any more when I am out and about. It is a bit pricey but so worth it. This is not a review, but my own personal opinion on the this product.  It is non-greasy and after it feels silky so really nice feel on your skin. lanacane chaffing gel

How do you deal with chub rub? Love to hear other people’s tips.

Cheers for reading X

This is not a review, it is just me wanting to share my experience of  ways to deal with chub rub.

Mummy Fever - Share With Me
Cuddle Fairy
Twin Mummy and Daddy

What is Home?

Hey readers,

The people of Wayfair went on the hunt to find out what home is for people. This is what Wayfair did:

We hit the streets of London over the Easter weekend equipped with an armchair and a microphone to find out what home really means to us! The findings were both insightful and heartwarming, exposing that our homes are much more than just buildings or places, they are family, comfort, inspiration, happiness and much more. Not only that, but we spoke to a further 400 recipients across the UK & found that over 71% of people coined the sofa as the most important item of furniture in their home, placing the importance on socializing and making use of communal spaces (or being couch potatoes if you look at it another way!)  

Wayfair are doing a campaign on ‘What is Home?’ and for me personally home is not necessarily the physical things but the meaning associated with home. It is safety where when I close the front door I can come into my home and feel less judged.

You see I am autistic and I struggle going out in the outside world, so knowing I have a place where I can relax and not have to put on a mask is comforting. It makes me feel less anxious especially after a hard day, I can come home to my family and just be me without the fear of being judged.

Home is a place where I don’t have to be agitated or on guard, I can kick back on the sofa and just be. Enjoying the calm moments of reading a book with a blanket whilst my two boys are playing next door together with their Lego.

It feels like home because I am a mum and I provide all the needs for my children where they can fun but also develop as children. Where they will hold the memories for years of all the happy times of their childhood.

It is times when we lounge on a Sunday as a family scrawled out whilst watching Big Heads and rooting for King Henry VIII over Donald Trump.

Home is where we get excited about the small things we can do together as a family like watching a sunset or have Sunday dinner and discussing why mummy is called poopoo, while the boys are in hysterics over the hilariousness of it all.

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What does home mean to you? What ideas stir up when you think of home?

Cheers for reading X

Cuddle Fairy
Bringing up Georgia
Pink Pear Bear

The many facades of a parent

Hey readers,

You never really understand what it is like to be a parent until one day you become a parent. I know cliche but so, so true. When I am thinking about my role as a parent there is so many different roles that make up a parent. There is more then just the practical side of just keeping the child alive and well. So I am going to uncover some of the roles that I do when I am playing the role as parent.

Entertainer: You are chief organiser of keeping little ‘uns entertained through the long hours of the day. You are the one person who a child relies on when they are bored, irritated and got nothing to do. They will come for you and hunt you down until you cleverly thing of something to occupy them even if it is just helping put the washing away.

Cleaner: Yep you clean them, bath them, do all the washing, cleaning, and cooking. Never would I imagine being one of those people that say that there is never enough hours in the day, jeez I am a fully fledged parent now doomed to get pleasure from reaching the end of the washing basket for all the length of two minutes 😉

Counselloryou will be their to comforter your little ones through the great pains of life. You will hold there hand and try to find the words that are suitable. You will try to listen to the irrational ideas and try to think like a five year old which for me is pretty dame hard. But a skill that you develop, some more then others, *ahem*.

Debator: as soon as your little joy learns to talk you will find that you have to learn the skill of saying the right thing and thinking on your feet for them tricky questions like why can’t I be a woman? what is love?  why do people die young? Also you need to have the right amount of information for suitability for the child. I personally find this tricky as you can easy get into a tangle web without even thinking about it.

educator: You are responsible in educating your child, making sure that they know how to use the toilet, learn to speak, communicate, read, write, develop some sort of emotional intelligence. You don’t realise how big this responsability is. It feels like a never ending journey, as soon as you smash one milestone another challenge emerges.

Child, Children, Bake, Cookie Cutter

Negotiator: this is challenging especially if the child does not like the word no. It can be tricky  during the time when they are two but lets face it they don’t like being told what to do at any age. Sometimes you have to meet in the middle where both child and parent are happy. If you have two children you have to teach them that they have to share and they will soon learn the harsh reality that life is a bitch and you can’t always get what you want. Although, sometimes you can and that is good enough.

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Referee: this is aimed at if you have two children or more. All day long I am constantly having to break up arguments, stopping  the rough and tumble that gets out of hand and try d generally to stop World War Three from kicking over both of them wanting the blue sodding plate. Best advice I can give you if you have two children is ALWAYS make sure that if you buy them something make sure that the other child has exactly the same. It doesn’t matter whether it be a sweet or a 99p balloon, they will argue over it and moan about why they haven’t got the same thing as the other child.

Cheers for reading X

Cuddle Fairy

Easy Ways To Make Your Family Room Look More Homely

Hey readers,

The living room is the perfect place for all the family to spend some quality time together, so you should aim to create a room that’s cosy and comfortable for everyone. Even really nicely decorated rooms can look stark and bare without the right finishing touches, so to bring it all together the perfect accessories are key. If you feel like your family room is currently bland and a bit lacking, check out these easy ways to make it feel more homely.

Add Cushions and Throws

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Cushions and throws will make a room immediately look more cosy and homely. They’re a good way to bring in some colour and texture into the room, but also have the benefit of being lovely and comfortable too. Perfect for snuggling up together with in the evenings and on lazy weekends. A cosy bed on the sofa is the perfect way for a sick child to recover when they’ve not been feeling well (and they’re pretty handy for cheeky naps for the adults too!)

Display Family Photographs

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Picture Source

When we all take so many photos this day in age, it would be silly not to display some of our favourites. Family photos are a great way for visitors to learn more about your family, and are fantastic little reminders of the fun you’ve had together. Gallery walls are popular and give you the opportunity to display lots of individual pictures. Before hanging your frames, lay them all out on the floor first so you have an idea of where each piece looks best. Add Glue dots from Glue Guns Direct to each corner of your photo. This will tack it to the inside of the frame, and prevent it from slipping down or moving once it’s been hung. Then use a spirit level to check each picture after hanging to make sure everything looks perfectly straight.

Don’t Disregard Lighting

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Lighting is so often overlooked, but it’s a a really important thing to get right if you want to create a nice ambience in your home. You should ideally go for a couple of different lamps with varying levels of brightness, then you can tailor the lighting to whatever you’re doing in the room. Lamps with multi touch brightness are especially good as you have even more control. If you buy lamps with neutral coloured bases, you can change up the shades whenever you get bored or want to update the colour scheme in your room. This saves money on shelling out for an entirely new lamp!

Put Down Some Rugs

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Rugs are great for bringing in some additional comfort underfoot, and can tie everything else in the room together. When you have young kids that like to play on the floor it makes it a lot nicer for them too. Another benefit of adding rugs to your space is that you can use them to section out different areas in a room. So for example if you have your dining table in your living room, a rug under that as well as one in the general seating area gives you defined spaces.

Display Some Decorative Items

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These are all of the other miscellaneous bits and bobs. Things like vases of flowers, candles, plants and ornaments. The key to getting your decorative accessories right is finding a good balance. You want to display pieces that show your personality but without cluttering or overcrowding the room. One good tip to remember is don’t display things that are smaller that a grapefruit. This will prevent your room from looking too busy. Arrange small groups of items, and play around with the layout of them to work out what looks best.

Cheers for reading X

Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com

Cuddle Fairy
 Diary of an imperfect mum
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