Why it’s good to cry

Hey readers,

I really struggle with my emotions at the best of times but there is one thing that I always fin helpful when dealing with my emotions and that is to cry.

crying

Before,  I used to hate it, as I felt so weak and a useless lump. However, my mindset has shifted as I got older and I came to the firm conclusion that I do enjoy a good old cry. It might not come to any solutions on how to deal with the problem but the feeling of when you cry feels like a cleaning of my motions, which I think is good for me mentally.

A lot of the time when I cry it occurs when I have had a build up of all the frustration and believe me and you I  get frustrated A LOT. I am autistic and struggle with seeing the world through a non-autistic way,  therefore I fee at times really angry and sad. That is why it is also important for me to find an outlet to get them feelings out in the open so they don’t get so overwhelming and interfere with my life too much.

crying 2

Therefore, I appreciate it when I cry, it is my body and mind telling me to let go, just let it all out and to me it feels like all the tension floating away. The after feeling of crying is what I enjoy the most, that transition where I can think clearer. I might not have any power to sort out a problem, nevertheless it helps make me think a bit more logically.

I see crying as a healthy way to manage my emotional response to a problem. we all cry  whether we admit to it or not. We should celebrate crying more and view crying as a natural reaction to situations when we feel sad.

crying 3

Research has highlighted that crying actually has a chemical response in the fact that we reduce our manganese levels. It has been found that when we cry the mineral manganese affect our mood and it is 30 times greater concentrated in tears then in the blood serum.

Crying gives us more control as we are actually physically doing something to help ease the pain, acknowledging the feelings and in a sense has been a way to helps humans survive in life.

Cheers for reading X

Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com

Mummuddlingthrough
diaryofanimperfectmum

Why running rocks!

Hey readers,

Recently I returned to running and got hit again by the running bug, I just love and let me tell you why!

Because running gets you out of the house and you get some fresh air.

running 3

If your like me, I get quite frustrated with my inadequacies as a person and since I have started running have found running really great to just burn off them feelings.

It is good for you physical health, I only do running three times a week but I still find it beneficial in helping me ton up my legs and help strength my arms (as I am on medication where one of the side effects causes me great deal of physical pain).

You feel like you have achieved something positive and can make you feel better for it.

It is really fantastic to help you sleep if you do in the evening or alternatively, if you do it first thing in the morning it can set you up for the day.

running 2

You build up stamina which is always handy if you have young children and they want you to run after them in the park.

I had a break from running for a few weeks and definitely missed it. Once I stsrted again with running I found it made me much happier in myself and like I achieved something.

Obiviously, a bonus reason for running is it burns of calerioes which who can not deny is wonderful.

If you have children it sets an example regarding doing exercise and a positive message of seeing it occur.

You never fully appreciate a shower until after a hot sweaty run.

It is free, you can do it practically any where and at any time if you wish.

running 1

There are so many free apps like c25k to help beginnings that are a great guide to help you know where to start. If you are really confident then there is an event called parkrun (again free) where you run with others and such buzz, plus the feeling of being part of the running community.

As a parent you sometimes lose yourself, so it is good to do something for yourself, a bit of ‘me time’ where it is an activity solely for you to enjoy and get something out of.

Cheers for reading X

 

 

 

Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com

Mummuddlingthrough
diaryofanimperfectmum

I hate the term girl gang

Hey readers,

There is this term knocking about on the internet called GIRL GANG and I hate it with a passion. Let me tell you why, well for a start I don’t need people to help me and nor do I like a person based on their gender. It is really not important to me and as sickly as it sounds I like a person because of who they are and not because they have a vagina.

girl gang

I don’t want to be an arse licker and you get that sense with this whole phenomena  of the term girl gang. I chose who I like and some girls quite frankly are twats where as others are my idols.

I don’t belong in gangs, it gives a sense of threatening and I don’t believe in ganging up on people to like you or others.

girls

The whole term of girl is condescending anyway, like we are not allowed to be called women because they are too hostile. But that is what we are and we should celebrate it. But also we don’t need to have to push our gender out there surely, shouldn’t we just forget about that and celebrate the actually person.

There are all these kind of ideas of the people in a girl gang whereas if it is men they don’t go on about their gender but merely just get to the point. Which is what is much more attractive. Some great women are not bold and assertive that doesn’t make them less of a female and any less of a reason to celebrate them. You only get certain type of person in these gangs but there is so much more to a person then a title.

feminism

I class myself as a feminist in the sense that everyone should have equal opportunities regardless of your gender. It should be fair and not sticking silly labels to an idea of empowering others when really all you are doing is excluding others. If you want help then cut the sectioning off and let’s just celebrate people regardless of whether they have a vagina or not and see them as a person in their own right.

Cheers for reading X

diaryofanimperfectmum
Mummuddlingthrough

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Wet day outings

Hey readers,

When days are wet and you can’t bear another day trapped in the four walls while you slowly go  insane then you must check out my safe list of places to go indoors. They are child friendly, dry and more importantly cheap.

1) Go to the library, read some books, choose some books and let the kids check them out. It is all very exciting and costs nothing.

library

Via Pixabay

2) Your local garden centre is great as it has lots of random tat and they tend to have a coffee shop. Not to mention if your lucky enough fish to see and everyone is happy!

3) Got to love going to IKEA.  Child friendly, free play for 3yo, cheap food and child themed play areas. Both my boys love this place and they can run around causing them to tire them out, #winning.

4) Hit a coffee shop, my boys adore the mini cups as they feel like an adult. I also appreciate the atmosphere as it is a great chilled vibe.

5) McDonalds where you can go get a happy meal and it comes with a toy, what more could child want.  I have wrote a post here why I love this place so much!

mcdonalds

Via Pixabay

6) Get on a bus for a adventure. My boys love a good trip out on a bus.

7) We live near a free (whoop) green conservatory area for the public. It had plenty of green and a pond full of fish. Beautiful settings and makes a change for me and the boys.

8) Faithful museums are free and educational.

museum

Via Pixabay

9) If in dealt go to Pets At Home, it is basically a free zoo.

10) If you want have a sit down in a quite, dark room, go to your local Odean where every morning during holiday time and weekends term time they have tickets for children films for £2.50.

Cheers for reading X

Diary of an imperfect mum

Ways that I de-stress

Hey readers,

Sometimes, for whatever reason it can be hard to wind down, particularly if your stressed out and full of energy. It is good to have a plan to know what kind of things that help you unwind. I know myself, when feeling angry I can not think rationally. That is why it is important to think pre-stress to what helps you calm down. There are many things but I thought I would give you some of my own personal example of things that help and you never know, they may help you.

stressed

via Pixabay

  1. Colouring.
  2. Taking a hot shower.
  3. Writing a poem.
  4. Writing blog post about your experience.
  5. Getting distracted by ideas on Pinterest.
  6. Going out for a walk to clear your head and taking yourself away from the situation.
  7. Reading and losing yourself in a story. Helps to focus on something different other then what you are presently feeling.
  8. Painting nails can make you feel better and also it is a physical think which needs your attention.
  9. Watching a comedy and laughing is good for the soul.
  10. Singing some songs can make you feel better and get the frustration out.
  11. Drawing some doodles or sketching can be therapeutic.
  12. Having a sleep and escape from it for a bit.
  13. Doing some exercise can help kick out some of that pent up frustration.
  14. Being kind to yourself – positive affirmations. Remembering that what you feel now is temporarily.
  15. Do some housework, something that can make you feel better and in control.

Cheers for reading X

Diary of an imperfect mum

The things that I want to work on.

Hey readers,

I don’t really do resolutions but I like to have goals just generally to ty and strive to. So I thought I would write them down, no pressure to achieve them but do what I can.

  1. Learning to say no and not instantly saying yes because that is what people want to hear. Then later having to deal with the anxiety. Knowing that I can take my time and not instantly  reply.
  2. Being more accepting of myself and that I have faults but does not make me less of a person.
  3. Being more open with how feel and even improve how I express myself. Even if it is a tiny smidgen it is better then staying put.
  4. Working better on my atrocious grammar, something I am constantly striving to improve. English language is a struggle for me so there is always room for improvement.
  5. Having more confidence, I know so common but so true. I have very low confidence especially when it comes to parenting.
  6. Eating healthy and making  better choices when it comes to food.
  7. Getting better camera control when doing YouTube videos. Stop being so lazy and take my time with the tripod.
  8. Increasing my social media stats would be nice. Who doesn’t hey and though I am not that bothered and I don’t have a huge influence, it is nice to work on something that is visual and know you can grow from working on your blog.
  9. Getting better in social environments, even if it is just asking a shop assistant for something or going in and ordering something. I am constantly anxious and worry about being embarrassed in front of people.
  10. Not holding on to destructive thoughts or taking things personally. This is first mode I go into and trying to reason more would help me greatly.

Cheers for reading X

3 Little Buttons

Why, why, why?

Hey readers,

I am sitting here by myself because it is half term and my eldest has been a terror to put it politely. Sometimes I end of the day feeling so frustrated that I just wished to be let free in a room full of China. I am not sure how I am going to cope through the two weeks without the break, I am sure we get through it but at the beginning of the holiday I dread it.

Why is it I try my  bestest to do something with the sprog and then all he does is pushes mine and hubby’s buttons. It fucks me off, I try and it results in fights and mayhem. He encourages the youngest to throw pens and then the youngest gets boisterous and rips the paper. Then pulls of as many Christmas decorations as possible from the Christmas tree on purpose and the eldest thinks the most hilarious thing to do is pull his trousers and pants down, he is laughing his head off and no one is laughing, fml!

Today just feels like my eldest is in a destructive mood and will go out his way to be a pain in the arse. No matter how much time I give him or get things to do, he is having none of it. I don’t know whether he is not getting warn out like the days he is at school where he can get over stimulated. Almost like an uneven balance of stimulation. Right now I am so pissed off with it all. I am pissed of with myself for getting so emotional about such stuff. I know it is a cliche but you do the worst thing and compare yourself to all the perfect parents on the internet. Why can’t my children be so chilled like other people’s children without turning it into a scene and making me feel totally deflated and a crap parent.

I am sat here writing this close to tears with rage. I have come on adult time out if you will because if I don’t then I will literally blow my top off. Seriously, today I am just struggling with parenting and knowing where to reach that balance. It doesn’t matter how many threats or putting on time out, my son is in that ‘mood’ where he is just not playing ball.
This may make me sound an awful parent but that the thoughts that cross my mind is why do I bother with all this stress when I maybe as well not bother. It could so simpler for me to not care, not to be engaging and just stick the TV on 24/7 and be done with it.  At least I wouldn’t have to deal with the challenging behaviour.

All I can say is some days being a parent is shit, I know awful but true. I am not perfect and sometimes dread it and can’t wake till the end of the day when I have break and my brain gets given a change to think about anything.

Cheers for reading X

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