I am so unbelievably tired right now, that I even fantasy about closing my eyes, even if it is just for five minutes, the thought is beyond wonderful.
I suppose when you are a parent you instantly lose the right to sleep whenever the mood takes you. Ironically you only appreciate sleep when you can’t do it, which makes it much more appealing.
If I could give my younger self one piece of advice it would be to enjoy sleep and get as much as possible, saviour it, never, ever forget that sleep is absolutely beautiful thing to do.
My word of the week is:
I haven’t done a word of the week linky for awhile because I just wanted a break from all the linkies. But truth be told I miss linking up my blog to linkies because it pushes me to engage socially, which is always a positive for an autistic person like myself.
Also, I have learnt it is my blog and I can chose whether I want to participate or not, I don’t always have to do it every week. I have learnt not so strict and irritable.
I am not going lie it helps to link up with my stats and I love numbers so always a bonus for me.
Also, I struggle as I tend to get so overwhelmed with blogs that joining in with linkups helps me learn about new content, good or bad, it is food for thought. It can provide inspiration or give different avenues for blog ideas.
Sometimes, you just got to try and see what works for you, I never stop learning and that is one major thing I love about being a blogger.
Cheers for reading X
There is this term knocking about on the internet called GIRL GANG and I hate it with a passion. Let me tell you why, well for a start I don’t need people to help me and nor do I like a person based on their gender. It is really not important to me and as sickly as it sounds I like a person because of who they are and not because they have a vagina.
I don’t want to be an arse licker and you get that sense with this whole phenomena of the term girl gang. I chose who I like and some girls quite frankly are twats where as others are my idols.
I don’t belong in gangs, it gives a sense of threatening and I don’t believe in ganging up on people to like you or others.
The whole term of girl is condescending anyway, like we are not allowed to be called women because they are too hostile. But that is what we are and we should celebrate it. But also we don’t need to have to push our gender out there surely, shouldn’t we just forget about that and celebrate the actually person.
There are all these kind of ideas of the people in a girl gang whereas if it is men they don’t go on about their gender but merely just get to the point. Which is what is much more attractive. Some great women are not bold and assertive that doesn’t make them less of a female and any less of a reason to celebrate them. You only get certain type of person in these gangs but there is so much more to a person then a title.
I class myself as a feminist in the sense that everyone should have equal opportunities regardless of your gender. It should be fair and not sticking silly labels to an idea of empowering others when really all you are doing is excluding others. If you want help then cut the sectioning off and let’s just celebrate people regardless of whether they have a vagina or not and see them as a person in their own right.
Cheers for reading X
Sometimes, I feel shocked and how instinctive I become over my children. Even though I am autistic I always thought I would never match up with other other parents. I always felt that little bit different, like something is missing but I can’t find it. But then life surprises you at times, sometimes they are the best times, the unexpected situations that really blow you away.
I find that when I am in the mist of self-doubt and uncertainty being in a situation to defend yourself and ultimately being emerged in it, some inner strength comes along and you can do it, if exposed to that situation.
You learn more things about yourself then you would ever imagine and sometimes it is that small victories hat can make you feel so much better. Therefore enabling me to create a better and stronger attachment between myself and my children.
You can almost forget what you can do because the brain and the thoughts are so distorted that it alters your reality. Sometimes us mums are so hard on ourselves that it is barbaric the mental torture we put on ourselves. The sad thing is that I am doing ok, but sometimes with all the mixed messages out and about it can cause confusion, leaving you feel a little lost.
Then small nuggets of enlightenment can help you grow in your confidence in your ability to parent. Ideally, I have always found that stepping away and giving yourself time to be without constantly listening to the noise. This can help give me that break to think more clearly. Even if it is to just simply breakdown and have that time to just allow all them emotions escape. Sometimes, feelings can be built up so much that they can be real burden. So, allowing them to be expressed and getting it out of your system is really beneficial instead of it building up and weighing you down.
I have always found that in one way or another you will find way, it may take time but you will grow. Just hold on through and that moment will pass, even though it feels like hell at the time.
Cheers for reading X
Is it just me now,
or is the air getting cold ,
I am shivering.
One of my favourite past times is to watch clouds particularity when the sky is so blue and the clouds are so fluffy. Sometimes I think of when I was a child looking up and thinking that the clouds went on and on, never really ending. I just love the sun shining down and watching the clouds float about their day. I like to make patterns and see what kind of formation I can make and guess what companion thinks siting with me on the warm grass of a hot summer. These things are free but so beautifully forgotten about.