Today I feel crap (again). Eaten too much sugar, so miffed with myself and deluded. Yesterday was better, I eat sensibly then the stress got to me and my impulses were strong. I need something but I don’t know what exactly, I just feel stuck and can’t get out of this pattern of being good a couple days and then binging. I need focus but I need to stick with one idea and then just go with it.
Why there is so much information out there, my head can’t deal with it, ffs.
It is so hard because you can’t control all external influences, i.e. hubby buying cake and having the will power to say no, but I am still weak.
SUGAR IS A DRUG – and I am still very much dependant on it especially when I am feeling shit as a parent and dealing with the mental torture that I inflict myself each day.
Argh, I am so frustrated and angry with myself, but this won’t help will it. I need to stop this beating down I do to myself.
I know it is me and my own responsibility, seriously I need to be nicer to myself, that would be a great start.
Cheers for reading X